& I have this friend, you see.
She’s a good friend & an overall fine gal,
makes a good bloody mary,
washes behind her ears,
& never picks her nose in public.
What else could you ask for in a friend,
really?
But there’s this & here’s the thing…
She’s got this tattoo…
& the tattoo goes all the way around her arm
& it’s red and it’s black and it’s white,
& it’s like a Nazi armband.
She’s a good friend & an overall fine gal,
makes a good bloody mary,
washes behind her ears,
& never picks her nose in public.
What else could you ask for in a friend,
really?
But there’s this & here’s the thing…
She’s got this tattoo…
& the tattoo goes all the way around her arm
& it’s red and it’s black and it’s white,
& it’s like a Nazi armband.
Complete with Swastika.
Perfectly nice girl,
but I do wonder about her judgment.
I mean, she’s never so much as hinted
that she & I should go
running through town on a Saturday night
& break storefront windows
of Jewish shop owners
or invade Poland.
& maybe she’s into Nazi imagery
the same way the next guy is into Star Wars
or Twilight.
But is it still too soon?
& I mean, even me…
I have this damn John Edwards ’08 tat
to remind me of my own embarrassing past.
But a Swastika?
Let me lay it down –
if it were me?
I’d get the thing retouched
into something less horrific.
Like maybe an image of Kevin Costner
being sodomized by the Bee Gees.
But the tat is there
& from the looks of it
it’s not going anywhere
for as long as she still has the arm.
& I remain her friend
despite my doubts.
But we never talk politics
& I never use her shower
or her oven.
Seems like your friend is such a nice girl as long as she's wearing sleeves.
ReplyDeleteIt's difficult to comment on such a sensitive subject and not seem callous, but noting that I in no way shape or form support genocide, this was pretty funny to me.
"...and I never use her shower or her oven."
ReplyDeleteYou kept a good meter with this piece; it was almost (even) light-hearted in a Buchenwald-sort-of-way.
Until that line.
"Kids! Use common household fixtures as Implements of Ethnic Cleansing!"
Chilling. Like the Swastika.
(I like this.)
Hey, Rob. Yeah, she wears a lot of long sleeves. You don't seem callous, but it's good that you concern yourself with that. If we get too flippant, they'll block my page in Germany, where they still get a bit touchy about this subject...
ReplyDeleteThanks, Will. I find people will tolerate almost anything if you cloak it in humorous clothes.
There's the Germans... then there's the Bee Gee who may be touchy about spilling the beans regarding their tryst with Kevin... one GOOD thing, don't think Kev 'll mind the extra publicity, god knows he could use it.
ReplyDeleteWas the mention of Hitler in the previous blog a heads up?
I think I'll heed warning and buckle my seatbelt now!
It makes me wonder... What WERE the Australians doing while the rest of us were bust bashing heads in WW2?
ReplyDeleteI see what you're trying to do now Nesia, don't you go stirring up the hornets nest! >;oP
ReplyDeleteI don't know, I guess they got swept under the ALLIES rug in my WW2 History class like so many others.
But I think there's a movie about it called Australia.
p.s. "bust bashing heads," I like that! That's a good one there!
ReplyDeleteThe "bust bashing heads" was a typo.
ReplyDeleteMy typos are sometimes better than my intentional material...
oh, a typo... I still like how it turned out.
ReplyDeleteHalf of my best shit is accidental.
ReplyDeleteI'll take the compliment.